Thursday, July 24, 2008

Psst, psst . . . I have a secret . . .

And it is HUGE! But I know I can trust all of you, because you don't know any of my real life friends and if you do I know you won't say anything, because that just isn't who you are. I can trust you, right?!?! This is big, well bigger than big, you may want to sit down.

You see, here's the secret . . . I'm pregnant. Yep, that's right I'm with child, knocked up, having a baby. I know we thought we were done, too, but obviously someone had other ideas. We are still in shock, but no one had a heart attack, so we are leaning towards "We're happy." We are not at "We're thrilled." yet, but this hit us out of no where.

Here's a little background for those of you who don't know my history:
I hated being pregnant. I was sick the entire time and was on the second highest dosage of Zofran they can give. The Zofran made it so I wasn't throwing up all day, but I was still queasy. I had so many IV treatments that I had to have a PIC line put in so they wouldn't have to give me IV's in my feet. To make things worse, Trinity was breach for most of the pregnancy and was using my gall bladder as a pillow. They thought that there was a chance I would have to have surgery removing my gall bladder after I gave birth. Thankfully that didn't happen. Overall, I was miserable the entire pregnancy.

So, from very early on in Trinity's pregnancy I made sure everyone knew I was having an only child. You couldn't pay me enough to be pregnant again, yet here we are and absolutely no money has changed hands. Okay that isn't entirely true, because the pharmacy now has the majority of my money & by the time this pregnancy is over I'm sure they will own my house, too. (Zofran is EXPENSIVE!).

Starting last year I've been having unusually long cycles. One was 6 months last year and this year it was 3 1/2 months, but I don't deal well with hormonal birth control, so that was out as an option. We've been using protection, but apparently not enough. I started feeling like AF was showing last week, but nothing. Yesterday I had to run down to the drug store for some paper towels for the studio & some voice in the back of my head said "Something is off in your body, you should test." So I bought a test, peed on a stick, fell off the toilet (I hadn't finished peeing when the positive showed up) and promptly called the clinic. I have a history of miscarriage, so I always have a blood test done. My hcg levels are 2713 & I go in for a dating ultrasound next week. We aren't telling anyone, because of our history of miscarriage, the fact that we are still in shock so 'congratulations' seems hollow, and because we have no freaking idea when we are due.

So, there it is, our secret & it is a whopper isn't it. Now I know it is hard to keep a secret, but I must insist on you not telling ANYONE. After all, what if my family found out - eep!

15 comments:

Jovi said...

oh my goodness! that is a shocker! *hugs* maybe it won't be so hard this time...one can hope! i have a couple friends with hypermesis and one is on her 5th pg (eep indeed!) and it's her easiest yet.

mazel tov, and b'sorot tovot! (congratulations and may you only hear good news!)

xoxo

whittyanne said...

wow neda! didn't want to twitter back for fear of ruining the "surprise" for other twitter peeps. i have to say congrats - i don't think it's hollow to say as it's exciting news! i'll keep my fingers crossed for it to stick and for you to have a much better pregnancy this time. i remember your nightmarish PG last time - hopefully this one will be a breeze!

Jennifer said...

Neda,
I will keep my fingers crossed that this pg will be easier than the last. Congrats and I can't wait to hear how it all goes.

Petra said...

Wow, congratulations.. I hope this time is easier than it was with Trinity!!

*hugs* Whee for the universe saying *poke* "You thought YOU were in charge?"

*laughs*

Brooke said...

Holy shit! I never in a million years would have guessed that this was it. I'm really happy for you, and everything is crossed that things go well for you. This baby is so lucky...you're a great mom, and I'm glad you might the chance to do it again. Take care!

Crunchy Domestic Goddess said...

holy crap, neda!! congratulations. :) i know this isn't what you expected or planned, but it must have happened for a reason. maybe trinity needs a little bro/sis. ;)
hugs to you. i hope everything goes soooo much better this time around.

Dawn said...

lol congratulations... I think :) Seriously, I wish you the best. Lots of healthy, happy, safe pregnancy vibes sent your way :)

Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You

candesintx said...

I'm so happy for you. I remember your pg and the ups and dwns you had.

I'll be praying for a easy pg this time.

Angela Miller said...

Congratulations! I was wondering if you were pg. I saw your comment on twitter about being shocked. I will pray that this pg will stick and be much easier.

Sara said...

A very "non-hollow" congratulations!
I hope things go better this time around... my 2nd pg was better than my 1st.
Wishing the best for all of you!!!

Chelle said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!! :)

Melissa said...

Wow Neda! Amazing news! I hope that this pregnancy is easier on you.:o)

Melissa

sonnenflower said...

Neda,
Congrats! I will be praying that this pregnancy will be much, much easier than the first one

Penny said...

oh oh oh oh oh!! Amazing news Neda! Been wondering what you've been up to and now I know... uh... I mean now I understand LOL!

All the million best wishes and sticky vibes to you! Good luck good luck and big hugs. I do hope it isn't quite as bad for you this time.

Wow - Trinity is going to be one VERY happy girl if everything goes to plan. ;)

Astarte said...

WOW! I'm a lurker, but I HAD to post on this one!!!! I hope you are well, and that this journey is better than your last was. I have a friend whose first went like yours, and while the second wasn't exactly a piece of cake, it wasn't anywhere near as bad as the first, either.