Thursday, May 22, 2008

Standing on my soapbox

I was Twittering this morning and was directed to a new blog entry on one of the daily blogs I read (Suburban Turmoil). It was about brag hags and from there I was directed to a Today show interview/story about Cocktail Playdates. I now feel the urge to blog about cocktail playdates. In the spirit of full disclosure I must admit to the following list of items:

1. I have never been to a Cocktail Playdate.
2. This is the first I had heard of Cocktail Playdates.
3. I rarely drink.
4. Alcoholism runs in my family.

Okay, that being said you probably all think I’m going to bash these mothers, well I’m not. I actually do not see anything wrong with this practice. The psychiatrist that the Today show had on kept spouting about how you cannot effectively parent if you have a cocktail. I would have loved if Meredith Viera would have asked her if she stopped drinking completely the day she became a mother. Because according to this psychiatrist as a mother we must NEVER EVER have an alcoholic beverage. To do so automatically puts our children in danger. I do not see the difference between having a cocktail playdate and having a glass of wine at home while fixing dinner. If a mother is at home and getting drunk and neglecting her children, then obviously that is not the situation I am condoning. I’m talking about a glass of wine or a margarita or a cosmopolitan. The psychiatrist or Meredith asked about what would happen if the child got injured and had to be taken to the hospital – uh, call 911. Isn’t that what you would do if you were at home? Is there anything different between having a cocktail with friends at a playdate and going home and going out to dinner with your husband, having a glass of wine and going home to care for your child(ren). I say there is not.
Again, in the spirit of full disclosure I will admit that I have drank alcohol in front of my daughter. Okay, so to add to that I will publicly humiliate myself by admitting that just last week I did so and she got ahold of said drink and started to drink it herself before I saw her and grabbed it away. I think that part of parenting is teaching our children how to make smart choices. I’ve had more alcoholic beverages in May (3) than I have the previous 8 months (0). I think that teaching Trinity that once she is 21 that drinking can be done responsibly by example does not make me a bad parent. And to all of you cocktail playdate having moms – I think you are teaching your child(ren) how to make smart choices. Also, can I come too?


Suburban Turmoil said...

Here here!

Petra said...

Wow.. Yeah.. Now, I can see a concern if the whole POINT of the afternoon is to drink cocktails while basically letting the kids entertain themselves, that would worry me some.. but..

Otherwise? If we're talking sitting around with your friends having A margarita while the kids play? Not a problem.

Or have a glass of wine with dinner. Heck, though I wouldn't let Fi (at 4 ;)) drink a glass, as she gets older, I full intend for her to learn about alcohol *safely* with us. I'm not going to get her trashed, or serve her friends, BUT.. I'd rather she learn that booze isn't a big deal and treat it with a negligent respect, then flip out about it when she goes off to school!

And to be honest, we've thrown some pretty raucous parties (that involved me getting uhm, less than sober) since she was born. There was no sloppy drunkenness until she was asleep, and one parent always kept their own imbibing to a minimum so that if an emergency arose there was someone responsible to handle it... But.. We're parents, we don't stop being social individuals who want to be with our friends and occasionally even indulge.

People are dumb. Silly puritanical country.

Kaza said...

Quite frankly I don't see how I could possibly parent effectively without a cocktail (well, in truth, glass of wine, if that qualifies, though now and then I do have a martini) to help me unwind at the end of a stressful day, for cripes sake. This judging of mothers is really getting tired, and boo to the media who egg it on in the name of ratings. Thanks for blogging on it!

(And thanks for visiting and commenting on my blog! I love yours and will add it to my list!)